Lots of married couples like to pretend extramarital affairs just don’t happen or at least not in their houses. But the truth is affairs do happen. They’re a lot more common than you might think, and women are almost just as likely to step out on their relationship as their male counterparts.
There is a common misperception that it’s only men who cheat on their marriage and that women are always faithful. Who are all these men cheating with exactly? Do heterosexual men only cheat with single women and each other?
The truth is that approximately as many married women cheat as married, men. Research result that ten to twenty percent of men and women in marriages or other committed (monogamous) relationships will actively engage in sexual activity outside of their primary relationship. These numbers are likely under-reported, possibly by a wide margin, Are you cheating if you look at porn? If you flirt on social media? If you have a profile on charming movie star that you check regularly, even though you never hook up in person?
Now that we know women are not as opposed to cheating as we’d like to think, it’s time to dive deeper into the reasons so many women are abandoning their vows. I spoke with several experts to find out, and while some reasons may be just what you expected, others might really give you pause.
So Why Do Women Cheat?
Woman cheat on a committed partner for one or more of the following reasons:
They crave intimacy.
Women tend to feel valued and connected to a significant other more through non-sexual, emotional interplay than sexual activity. When they’re not feeling that type of connection from their primary partner, they may seek it elsewhere.
Overwhelmed by the needs of others.
Research about women who cheat indicates that many women, despite stating that they deeply love their husband, their home, their work, and their lives, cheat anyway. These women often describe feeling so under-supported and overwhelmed by having to be all things to all people at all times that they seek extramarital sex as a form of life-fulfillment.
Do not having enough satisfying sex at home.
There is a societal misconception that only men enjoy intimacy. But lot of of women also enjoy sex, and if they’re not getting it at home, or it’s not enjoyable to them, for whatever reason, they may well seek it elsewhere.
Women can experience loneliness in a relationship for any number of reasons. Maybe their spouse works long hours or travels for business on a regular basis, or maybe their spouse is emotionally unavailable. Whatever the cause, they feel lonely, and they seek connection through infidelity to fill the void.
Expect too much from a primary relationship.
Some women have unreasonable expectations about what their primary partner and relationship should provide. They expect their significant other to meet their every need 24/7, 365 days a year, and when that doesn’t happen, they seek attention elsewhere.
Women are responding to or re-enacting early-life trauma and abuse.
Sometimes women who experienced profound early-life trauma, especially sexual trauma, will re-enact that trauma as a way of trying to master or control it.
They feel underappreciated, neglected, or ignored.
They feel more like a housekeeper, nanny, or financial provider than a wife or girlfriend.
So they seek an external situation that validates them for who they are, rather than the services they perform.
Any man who is concerned about why women cheat on their husband, these are a suggest, “you should really start looking at your own behavior in the bedroom and really make sure that you’re holding up your end of the table. Because, if you’re not, there’s somebody out there who’s more than willing to do that.”